 The middle-
aged woman went to see her doctor.
"Well, what's the trouble?"
"Doctor, it's headache, shooting pains in my legs
and high blood pressure."
"How old are you?" asked the doctor.
"I'll be 26 on my next birthday."
"H'mm," said the doctor, busy writing, "loss
of memory too." |
Mr. and
Mrs. Banta Singh's two-year-old boy was bawling away
loudly. Mrs. Singh asked her husband why their
son was being so difficult. "he wants to take a ride
on a donkey,"replied Banta.
"Then why don't you put him on your shoulders and
go for a run?" |
A Shopkeeper's
son had trouble with his eyes. He took the boy to
an eye-specialist who operated upon and replaced the
boy's eyes with those donated by a Minister .
A few days after the operation, the doctor asked
the father,"How's your son doing?"
"He is fine," replied the father,"but he keeps
on gazing at a chair whenever he finds one." |
A Sardarji
was travelling in a train. The ticket checker came
and asked him to show his ticket.
The Sardarji politely asked, "Which one should
I show, the one in my right pocket or the one in my
left pocket?"
The T.C. was taken aback. He then said, "Show
me the ticket in your right pocket".
The Sardarji promptly showed the ticket. it was perfectly
in order. The T.C. then requested the Sardarji to
show the ticket in his left pocket also.That was also
in order. The T.C. then asked for the reason for buying
two tickets.
The sardarji explained, "If someone picks one pocket
then I have the other ticket left." The T.C. asked
again,"Suppose someone picks both your pockets, what
happens?"
The sardarji replied with a smile,"I have third ticket
inside my pugree" |
A haryanavi
peasant came to the office of The Hindustan Times
placed an ad. announcing his father's death". The
rate is Rs.360/single col. cm.,"the clerk told
him.
"Main to lut jaoonga- I will be ruined,"exclaimed
the Haryanavi."My father was182 cms. tall." |
A girl
who was appearing in B.ED got married.The result of
B.ED was declared when She was in her in-laws house.
She had secured the first position and in her excitement
She sent a telegram to her father.
SUCCESSFUL IN B.ED
Due to efficiency of the telegraph department, the
father got the telegram as : SUCCESSFUL IN BED
The father cursed the daughter for sending this telegram
about her conjugal affairs. |
| Once
a Jat went to Mumbai. While passing through a road
he saw a very high building. He was amazed to see
it, and decided to count its stories. As he was doing
so a townsman saw him and tried to befool him. So
he approached the Jat and asked,"What are you doing?"
When he was told the answer the townsman said that
one had to pay rupees for every storey counted. "How
many have you counted?" The Jat said ten and gave
the man twenty rupees. Walking away the Jat was very
happy to think how he has befooled the other man,
for he had counted twenty. |
A village
tailor suddenly decamped leaving his clients in a
quandry. " He took my pant piece with him, " complained
Ram Pall.
" He took my suit lenth with him, " complained Ilahi
Baksh
Banta Singh had a more serious complaint, "
Mera to naap lay kar bhaag gayaa - he decamped
with my measurements. " |
Two terrorists
were driving their Maruti to the spot where they intended
to place their bomb. The one in driver's seat looked
very worried. " Natha, what happens if the bomb we
have on the back seat blows up before we get to the
site ? "
" Not to worry, " replied Natha , " I have a spare
one in my attache case. " |
